mrgoldendeal: Staff: The missing e hack is not going to harm your computer or account, it’s total bullshit, David Karp is just butthurt cause he can’t spell. legit.
May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness. I hope...– Neil Gaiman
2012 WoOoOo yEaH
pacify-eris: This is a post to let you guys know I’m not writing an end of year post because “time” is a social construct and there’s no such thing as a “year.” ~Happy New Nothing~
Anonymous asked: So I have really low self-esteem… I was in an abusive relationship for 8 months and now I'm always paranoid that every guy in my life with hurt me. There is this guy I'm currently seeing, and him and I had a fling a while back. He's changed a lot - Not as douche like - But he says he doesn't want another relationship. But honestly, all I want is for him to want me. In my...
Last night I was so stoned, I got into a staring contest with John’s ear and lost.
When there are rows upon rows of empty washing machines at the laundromat, so some creeper puts his clothes in the one right by yours.
itsateencrisis-deactivated20120 asked: You're like my spirit guide or spirit animal or something I swear. <3 you are also one super strong person, you are in all honestly an inspiration to me and probably anyone that's ever gotten to know you.
Anonymous asked: Do you still shoplift?
When you forget to pick your battles. Honestly, I shouldn’t have gotten upset last night. I was upset, but I shouldn’t have let it show. I shouldn’t have fought. I don’t think I was wrong to be upset; I had every right to be. But I was wrong to fight about it. It just wasn’t that important. I should have let it go. I’m such a dumbass sometimes.
i am so ugly when i cry
On the other hand, you have different fingers.– Jack Handy
i love my boyfriend because he cooks everything...
i was going to write a post about how much worse i...
so all you people who are anti-weed, you can never say that weed has never done anything for you; it just saved you from having to semi-irritatedly scroll past a few paragraphs of my endless bitching
poverty-with-class asked: So, I just started following you on Ian's recommendation. I'm his stoner friend from high school who sang for his band. I too have been addicted ADD meds (I love me some rids) and if you're ever in Kentucky, I'm probably your best bet to score some quality shit.
Jeezy: "So I was havin' a barbecue and I found out... if you're gonna cook cactus, you gotta know how to cook it."
John: " So I'm guessin you fucked that one up?"
John: "So how'd you try to cook it?"
Jeezy: "Uh... like green beans, I guess."
I keep forgetting that I'm not wearing socks.
as a general disclaimer
so-meta: I don’t actually know anything
dammit-daria asked: Hi, I have been following you for a while now and I relate to every single post you write. It makes me feel... comfortable? If that makes sense? Just thought I should let you know. You are one of my favorite people.
Sometimes I wonder if the whole thing was a complete accident and not intentional at all. I’m thinking about this because I’ve been crying a lot. A diet low in carbohydrates causes a decrease in seratonin production. Because celiac disease may be aggravating my lupus, I can’t eat anything with gluten. No wheat. Essentially, no carbs. I cry a lot. I still eat other stuff,...
That one song
it’s five o’clock in the morning and the conversation got boring you say you’re going to bed soon so I sneak up to your bedroom Whenever it comes on the radio, I’m like… who the fuck has sex because the conversation is boring? I feel so sorry for those people. I feel sorry for anyone who fucks someone who can hold a boring conversation.
Biology Teacher: So the sperm is surrounded with glucose
student: you mean semen is like sugar?
Biology Teacher: yeah basically
me: doesn't taste like..
lobizon asked: I used to have a sugar glider (named Splenda - i thought i was so clever). You wanted your followers to introduce themselves. I'm Holly and just turned 29 on Christmas. Live in Ohio and am working on PhD. Or was. Having some health probs so may be leaving school. I teach Human Sexuality. Live with my boyfriend and our dog, we have a nice garden. We're pretty boring
My new goal is to transform into a complete...
whenilookatyouithurts: karenfelloutofbedagain: Now, when I smoke pot, I can call it ‘working towards my goals’ instead of ‘being a lazy little fucker.’ I’ve never listened to a Grateful Dead song (DON’T KILL ME PETER) but that seems like a legit goal. Mind if I join you? Go on ahead. It’s a noble goal. [This is still a goal in progress.]
sometimesisaythings asked: Hey! I'm Cujo, and I was the follower that left that ask that said: "Oh hey. Went though your whole blog. I love you. The end." And I'm not a stalker, I swear! Haha! But yeah, your blog is all kinds of amazing. Just so's you know's.
Hi new followers.
I don’t have a flippin’ clue who most of you are. Wanna introduce yourselves?
bella-rain replied to your post: I have three weeks off from school and work. I’m trying to potty train my son….what exactly are you going to do to accomplish this? What methods? I don’t really have a method… if it was summer, I would have done what’s easiest with girls: If they’ve never had kool-aid or juice before so it’s really a treat, you take them to the...
I have three weeks off from school and work.
So, with all this spare time on my hands, I’m going to start my New Year’s Resolutions a week early. I say ‘New Years Resolutions’, but I guess they’re just things I want to accomplish in the next 3 weeks. Potty train Sophie Have a better temper with the kids Take better care of my body Get my house clean I have three weeks to work on it. If I can make those...
thatsashocker replied to your post: thatsashocker replied to your photo: Sugar glider… My boyfriend wants one sooo bad. I guess I didn’t realize it was a legit pet. I didn’t know people really owned them. Do you love it? Or is it a pain in the ass? They are so cute btw. Haha thanks. Yeah I originally got them to breed. I sold La’Bitch’s mate because I thought I wanted to get...
Kids talk the same as the people they grow up...
Not necessarily a bad thing. You grow up in the South where everyone says ‘yes, ma’am’ and ‘no, sir’, and you do too, automatically. It doesn’t seem polite to you; it’s just how you talk. But it sounds polite to others. We live in Kansas, where the lack of ‘sir’ or ‘ma’am’ after a reply only seems rude and lacking to the...
Don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good.– Voltaire (via nminusone)
Speaking of sugar gliders, the kids have already...
And she got in the oven. Good thing she’s so fucking fat, or I never would have caught her.
thatsashocker replied to your photo: Sugar glider and his Christmas dinner. you own this?!?! Well, I own a sugar glider… not this one specifically. My sugar glider is named La’Bitch, and this is one of her two pups, Master or Icharus (I can’t tell which). My best friend owns one and my boyfriend’s sister owns one, and they both live at my boyfriend’s mom’s...
A Christmas Miracle.
Me: What's this wrapper?
John: It's just a plain Swisher Sweet.
Me: Then why can't I feel my lips?
John: Because there's chocolate kush, grandaddy purp, and OG inside of it.
Anonymous asked: Currently on page 162 of your blog. I think I'm in love.
Best. Christmas. Ever.
It is indescribable how much I love having a family. John, the kids, and I celebrated Christmas this morning… as a family… it was the best. Then we went to his mom’s, just like real people do with their kids on Christmas. John’s mom and sister are more family to me than my family ever has been. They are just amazing people who treat all their friends like family, so there...
My brother got me To Kill a Mockingbird for...
I just bought the book, like, three days ago for my boyfriend. I’m absolutely thrilled at this. Not just because I love the book, but because I now have two copies of the book in my house. I’m carrying on my dad’s tradition: He owned a number of duplicates of every book relative to his opinion of that book. For example, we probably had three or four copies of To Kill a...