June 2011
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I write like J. K. Rowling →
THANK YOU. FINALLY SOMETHING GOOD.
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I wish the Lolita tag was full of Nabokov and not...
This.
There is a giant bowl of freshly-peeled papaya in my fridge,
there is an ice-cold kiddie pool on my driveway,
and I am waiting for the cocoa butter to soak in so I can put my bathing suit on.
(shhh, don’t tell me I live in Kansas. I may never figure it out.)
May 2011
So I got a booklet from United Way over different...
This summer, I could be Baking Volunteer for the Mental Health Association.
Or I could be a Garden Assistant for the Cerebral Palsy Research Foundation of Kansas, Inc, Adult Day Services.
Or I could be a BINGO Volunteer for Parents of Murdered Children.
This is really depressing.
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What if
one day I went somewhere and I saw Allison Harvard and I snapped a picture of her real quick and I posted it on Tumblr and it’d be so cool because it’d be a picture of her no one has seen before because like you know how like all the photos of creepy chan have been recycled a million billion times and if I had a picture no one had ever posted before I would be SO FUCKING COOL.
Calling someone fake wont make you real. Calling...
po-tato-chip:
daxxie:
thedawnmarie:
unfunnywhitegirl:
savageinasuit:
po-tato-chip:
nignoramus:
because its fun
because it’s true
because I’m an asshole.
because it’s hilarious
^Because you need to get a fucking life and get over yourself?
Apparently, people are twats and bullies. Scums of the Earth, I say. They’re obviously the stupid ones, admitting to being such asses...
nvm i found it.
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where is my watch
i cant find it
how can i run without a watch
help.
Stuff keeps getting tagged as #creepy chan and...
Like, it’s just some random blonde chick with squinty eyes and a pointy nose.
Every time I see it I’m just like…
*eye twitch*
You know what I think is funny?
When I see pro-life signs that say ‘Choose Life; Your Mother Did.’
It’s funny because my mom had lots of abortions.
lulz
Let's play a game. It is called How Much Jack...
If you guessed ‘Not nearly enough’, you win!
For forty dollars, the local beauty school will...
po-tato-chip-deactivated2011060 asked: http://nignoramus.tumblr.com/post/6027850159
Idgi there's no sex like what
Idgi there's no sex like what
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My computer is being super dumb.
It won’t load pages and it’s driving me crazy >.<
I’m trying to get to the running plan I want to follow for June, and it’s being a real bitch.
Anyway, gonna start running again. I got crazy-in-shape in about December, but I’ve been pretty couch-potatoey since then. :( So during the month of June, I’m doing kind of a full-body tune-up. Goal is to run...
matchstickmolly asked: Come be by me. I'll help. Bring the baby I have graham crackers.
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Of the six new followers I got today, four had...
Well I think that’s fucking stupid.
Watch: they’ll unfollow me because they’re offended. Then I’ll know they do care what other people think. Then my orginal statement that their claim is fucking stupid will be validated.
=D
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“I wish if I laughed in this bubble and it popped, it could laugh too.”
– Chelsey
matchstickmolly asked: We are communicating telepathically. I am sending you brain stuff.
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“Wow. Wow. I’ve never seen something that weighs that much jump that high.”
– Jordan
That awkward (read: infuriating) moment when a...
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I just had this sudden inexplicable fear that my...
I’m not even stoned yet…
matchstickmolly asked: Your name is karenfelloutofbedagain :(
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“Who is that? Taylor Swift?”
– Jordan.
While looking at a picture.
Of me.
(I hate her)
Me and my daughter were playing in her kiddie...
Barefoot, wearing nothing but swimsuits.
I told her it was time to go inside, and my brilliant little offspring decided it’d be strategically beneficial to hide in a rose bush.
Getting her out was not fun for either of us.
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whenever I see someone with a tattoo, I'm like......
