zendar73-deactivated20110730-de asked: congrats on the house
I got the duplex I wanted :)
2-bedroom, right across the street from campus (aka school, work, and childcare), park/waterpark directly to the south, HUGE oak tree in the front yard, washer/dryer hookups… I’m so happy :)
hnknta: i really wanna be a stay at home wife. why does that pose such a problem to some people.
cadaverouscorpse: I’m not complaining, but how the fuck have I lost more weight when for the past 3 days all I’ve done is eat fucking loads. gpoy. Yesterday I ate a LARGE Jamocha Shake from Arby’s, a TV dinner, AND oreos, and I somehow managed to lose a pound and a half since yesterday morning. This defies the laws of physics; that milkshake by itself weighed at least 2 lbs.
Oxford Comma Dropped: University of Oxford... →
I’m so mad about this. It is absolutely ridiculous to drop the Oxford comma. Not only does it add clarity, but it is just stylistically BETTER. I refuse to give it up! Give me Oxford comma, or give me death!
Went to YouTube to download the Rocky Horror...
Thom Yorke sat a piano singing, ‘This is fucked up’ for half-an-hour. We all...– Noel Gallagher (via engaging-random-acts)
Clorox, you are my only friend.
And you are my only chance of getting my security deposit back. You’ve always been there for me; don’t fail me now.
Here are the details of last night.
Anonymous asked: details of sex plz haha
Frolicked on the trampoline, watched Rocky Horror Picture Show, and then had the filthiest sex of my life, bar none. I’m not kidding, it was disgusting.
That awkward moment when your landlady comes over...
UN GARÇON ET UNE FILLE
whitedarkness: garçon: what is wrong? you look sad today. fille: i am sad… garçon: why for? fille: because the person in my head does not talk to me anymore.
My life is so perfect.
Love is the worst drug to be on because when you come down you fall the hardest.– a homeless man walking past me in Venice Beach (via scaryy-spice)
One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most...– Sigmund Freud (via grapejuicecity)
I am on a very strict diet of sweetened condensed...
I just changed the oil in my car ALL BY...
*With the help of my guy and one of his neighbours. It only took tools borrowed from two of his neighbours, two trips to Dillon’s, a trip to WalMart, and five hours. I feel so accomplished.
noahlennox: my fetish is people who are mentally unstable enough to like me
Your past is just a story, it isn’t happening anymore. Once you realize...– It’s a line from a book by Chuck Palahniuk. I don’t know which book. He said this to me last night, while I was curled up inside his arms and crying. If you’re lucky, in your life you will find one person who will tell you exactly what you need to hear when you’re at your...
They pulled the plug on my cousin's boyfriend...
I don’t know if he’s dead yet. They lived in a sawmill town where every man either hunts, farms, or works in the sawmill. You can’t support yourself on that salary. You just have to keep working in the sawmill until you can get an injury, and then the company pays off enough than you can buy some land and marry. I’m not exaggerating. That’s everyone in my family....
Less than four hours after taking an adderral,...
Weirdly, three hours were spent lying on the floor trying to get my heart to keep beating, and only one hour was actually spent accomplishing the six hours’ worth of cleaning. Imagine how efficient I could be if addies didn’t fuck with my heart.
Cleaning my room = going through stacks of my...
Oreos > showering.
I should eat
fashionhasnogender: rrrowr: threepwillow: goodmessagepussy: And possibly shower Possibly ugh gpoy been trying to talk myself into showering for like an hour I just don’t wanna gpoy also kitty litter omg this is my life right now. shut up, Tosh. you don’t know my life.
My cousin has finally come to accept that her...
Her little brother is back on life support, but he’s expected to survive, at least in some ways. Her boyfriend, on the other hand, is completely brain dead. It seems too unfair that you could be in such a horrible accident with the person you love the most, and be able to walk away from it with your body completely intact, but your soul and the person you love both dead.
Man. Yesterday was the best.
Frolicked in the fountains with John and the kids, went walking by the river and found a mannequin arm, went to the pool to go real swimming, fried oreos for dinner, then TayTay came over for a bit and we watched Freaks. It was an awesome day. Oh yeah and Jordan woke up to find a little kid in her bed :/
Instead of saying "cool story bro" try these out:
anotherfuckinghipster: unfortunatelylucky: 1) Fascinating Discourse Chum 2) Riveting Fable Comrade 3) Intriguing Anecdote Brethren 4) Perpetuating Argument Colleague 5) Sweet Saga Yo 6) Waste of Time Jerk 7) Spellbinding Reiteration There My Chumly Companion 8) Phantasmagorical Novelization Oh Great One 9) Interesting Intellect Imbecile 10) Trepidating Boar Fetus 11) Ballin’ Gossip...
She was always far too pretty for me to believe in...
Does anyone else know someone irl who is just such...
thenameisphil: Don’t we all?
They brought my cousin out of the coma today, but they said he was ‘combative’ and they were ‘worried about neurological issues’, so they put him back under. They said that the whole time he was awake, he was too sedated to speak, but he did open his eyes. What the fuck does that mean. What does combative mean. Like fighting? How can you be fighting when you’re so...