I'm Mik. Model, mother, moron. Future meta-magician. Former logic clinician.
My better half and I own Brainfood Bookstore in Longmont, Colorado. It is the only exclusively indie- and local-lit bookstore in the nation. We meet a lot of crazy folks.
Testimonial from a former roommate:
"Living with you was like living with a quiet little opinionated deer person who floated around like a ghost and said smart/nutso things and ate seaweed. "
I love Colorado. I love mountains. I love hiking. I read and write. I raise my children to the best of my ability. I have lupus and have defeated early-stage cancer twice, so I pretty much fully support the use of medical marijuana.
Catching Elephant is a theme by Andy Taylor
Today is Wear Purple for Lupus day… what are you going to wear today?
Going to the emergency room yesterday was basically the worst experience of my life. Essentially, I hit my hip while wrestling in the sand on the beach while camping, and what looks like a vein immediately bulged out of the thin skin on my hip where I have a pregnancy stretch mark. My boyfriend immediately was like, “We have to leave and go to a hospital,” but I didn’t want to ruin his night so I toughed it out for two hours, despite the fact that I was in excruciating pain and my friends kept making comments about how accident-prone I am. I kept a cold can of beer on it but it kept getting worse so I finally asked my boyfriend to take me home so I could put real ice on it. I broke down crying and he insisted on taking me to the hospital, despite the fact that I told him it would be so embarrassing and it wasn’t that bad.
Well, we get to the hospital and we’re answering the usual questions for the checky-in lady. She asks how long it’s been bad enough that I can’t walk without assistance (John was practically carrying me), and I told her that I have arthritis. She says, and I quote, “You’re too young for arthritis!” I reply, “I have lupus.” Nothing.
She puts me in a bed to wait in a screened off section of the waiting room, because I ‘look so miserable.’ My boyfriend keeps asking me what he needs to say to make them hurry. He’s used to ER visits being for difficulty breathing, and as soon as I say I have lupus, they wheel me back. But a bump on my side isn’t exactly an ‘emergency.’ I keep losing consciousness because of the pain, unintentionally scaring the shit out of John.
Finally they see me. The doctor looks at it, then looks at the nurse, then back at the bump. He pokes it, hard, completely ignoring my whimpering. Finally he informs me that it’s cellulitis— a skin infection. My boyfriend and I both say No. It popped up suddenly upon impact. Not an infection. Well, he says, then it’s probably just an abrasion. Mind, there’s not a single thing wrong with the outer surface of my skin. No cuts, no scrapes. It’s clearly something from the inside out. I’ve had one once before when I hit my hip on a doorframe, but it didn’t poke out so bad and only hurt when touched. The doctor says he can order a CT and a sonogram but he’s sure they won’t show anything and will just add to my bill. He’s not worried about it being a clot because it’s not hard and anyway clots in the trunk aren’t anything to worry about. He said they’d be more worried if it was on my leg. He says he doesn’t even know what to diagnose it is because it isn’t anything. My papers come, it says my diagnosis is ‘abrasion.’ It says, in not so many words, I went to the ER for a boo-boo.
They ask if I’ve taken anything for it. No, I don’t take painkillers. I have bad kidneys. Do I smoke. No. Do I drink. No. Do I do drugs. No. “Not even marijuana?” Well, marijuana. For pain, my boyfriend adds. “It’s still illegal,” the nurse says. “In this state anyway. I have a son in California who gets it prescribed—” If I lived in California, they’d prescribe it for lupus. “Do you have a prescription for marijuana?” No. “So you just take it for the hell of it then.” My boyfriend is ready to punch her. “Have you taken anything yet for the pain?” I’m ready to punch her.
The doctor asks if I want a Lortab. I say I have bad kidneys. He says Lortab is Tylenol-based so it’s processed by the liver. I accept the Lortab.
He brings it to me and my boyfriend says this is bullshit. You can’t just give her a Lortab and send her home. You don’t even know what’s wrong. The doctor says well what do you suggest I do? My boyfriend says I don’t know you’re the doctor, you should figure it out. The doctor says this is the emergency room and we treat emergencies and she can go to her doctor on Monday but for now all we can do is help the pain. I’m crying at this point. The immediate care is closed, I say. It’s 2:30 in the morning, or I would have gone to immediate care. I know it’s not an emergency. It just hurts. I’m crying. The doctor tells me I don’t need to get so upset that I cry. I’m not upset, I sob. I’m in pain.
This is why I didn’t want to go to the emergency room. I’m tired of being treated like I’m stupid.
Eventually the doctor avoids getting the shit beat out of him by my boyfriend and we go home, but I’m wondering. Has anyone else ever had anything like this? Not an encounter with a moron doctor, but something poking out of thin skin (like a stretch mark). It pulses and bulges so that’s why we thought it’s a vein. And it’s incredibly painful. Any ideas?
Yes, I have heard of juicing and desperately want to try it, but because I live in Kansas, it is almost impossible to get fresh marijuana. When I move to Colorado this summer and I am legally able to grow medical marijuana, I am going to start juicing. For those of you who don’t know: While smoking or ingesting dried marijuana helps reduce pain and even inflammation, it doesn’t treat the root of the problem. Ingesting ‘juiced’ fresh marijuana, in many cases, actually lowers ANA levels. ANAs are the antibodies that are literally killing my connective tissue (causing the pain and inflammation). Furthermore, the juice has little or no THC, meaning that it won’t get you high— aka, I can use it while still being a responsible parent.
I’ve had several people tell me I ought to start juicing. My boyfriend says it every time I smoke (because smoking is really bad on my lungs, which is why I usually eat edibles). And as soon as I move to Colorado, I will. I’m glad you mentioned it, and thank you very much for the title of the documentary— I wasn’t aware of that! I’m going to have to steal someone’s Netflix and watch it sometime :)
(Note: This is from a private discussion we were having about Hemp Seed Oil and its benefits both nutritionally and as a moisturizer. Just wanted to publish this now because hnhnta makes an excellent point I’d never though of before)
I know, right! I think the fatty acid thing is what I was trying to say haha. I mean I use it mostly medically by smoking, not for nutrition by ingesting, but only because I can’t get any fresh— despite the fact that preliminary studies show that marijuana ‘juice’ might reduce ANA levels in patients with lupus and other autoimmune disorders (which no other treatment, other than chemo and other toxins, is shown to do). It SUCKS that it’s illegal just because pharmaceutical companies want me to have to pay for (and be dependent on) treatments that are ineffective and harmful to my body.
But what you said about fixing world hunger is a point I’d never heard before, yet it seems plausible. Not that it would straight-up fix world hunger, but that hemp seed oil could be used as a nutritional supplement in places where most of the populace relies on sparse grain with little nutritional value. As we both noted, Hemp Seed Oil is the only naturally-occurring oil with not only all the essential fatty acids, but the same ratio needed by the human body. Let’s break this down: Any other oil or fat contains either not all the essential fatty acids, or the wrong ratios, meaning you have to eat a combination of fats and oils to get everything your body needs. In areas with high rates of hunger, people obviously don’t have the resources to go around eating some of this kind of fat and some of that kind of fat until they have enough to support brain and eye growth, fetal development, immune function, etc. What hnknta seems to be suggesting, and what I absolutely agree with, is that in such areas, an effective solution would be to plant a bunch of hemp (as she said, grows easily, and is more hardy than most grains), and let the people get all their essential fatty acids from hemp. Maybe not “Bingo, problem solved!” but definitely a step in the right direction.
And sorry I just got around to answering this, I passed out last night in the middle of our conversation :/
Willpower is deliberately poisoning yourself
every night before bed.
Eleven pills, all toxic,
meant to kill your immune system
before it can kill you.
Willpower is taking all eleven
(not giving up after three),
but not taking the whole bottle at once
(not giving up right now).
Soooo it looks like I have lupus.
Which is somewhat of a relief considering that after three hours in the the ER, they had this theory that I had syphilis.
I went in with really horrible joint pain… like I couldn’t walk at all… and they did some blood work. Which is usually a bitch because my blood pressure is usually REALLY low (92/75 last night) and my veins are tiny, but this brilliant nurse was like, “Well… why don’t we just use pediatric needles?” FUCKING BRILLIANT. Sooo they took blood with this little miniature needle set with teddy bears on it, omg sew kyoot.
Then they wrapped my elbow in gauze to stop the bleeding, nbd. Two hours later they were like okay you can unwrap it now… and all the skin under the bandage had turned purple and was blistering. omg sew grose.
Luckily, bloodwork came back negative for all the shitty stuff like syphilis, but I definitely have some sort of autoimmune shit going down. Hopefully it’s just MSAID with juvenile rheumatoid arthritis, but there’s also a possibility it’s lupus (supported by the fact that my skin started falling off). Unfortunately I can’t get in to see a rheumatologist that is in my insurance provider’s network until the 29th… of August. Thank you, American healthcare system!
